‘Kids have been overprotected offline and under protected online.’
– Jonathan Haidt
For children growing up in this digital age, social media has become a cornerstone of communication, connection and controversy, and concerns about its impact on young users have grown exponentially. As platforms such as Instagram, TikTok and Snapchat flourish, a pressing question arises: what are the appropriate age limits for accessing these platforms, and at what age it is appropriate to give children a smart device?
With the Australian Government forging ahead with legislation to enforce age restrictions on social media platforms, the discussion is not merely a matter of policy but one deeply rooted in the psychological effects of social media on the developing adolescent brain, as highlighted by the work of social psychologist Jonathan Haidt. Haidt makes a strong case that social media is severely harming young people.
Many platforms have set age limits, typically 13 years old, as a baseline for users. However, Haidt and other researchers have pointed out that this age threshold may not adequately reflect the cognitive and emotional maturity required to navigate these spaces safely. Adolescence is a critical period for identity formation, and social media can complicate this process – exposure to online bullying, unrealistic comparisons, and the pressure to curate a perfect online persona can lead to increased anxiety, depression and a diminished sense of self-worth.
Dr Becky Kennedy, clinical psychologist and founder and CEO of parenting company Good Inside, has partnered with Jonathan Haidt to create a guide of five simple, actionable steps you can take to see positive change. In her guide, Becky outlines strategies for how to set boundaries with your children (regardless of their age), resist their demands for smartphones and social media, and help them develop confidence, independence and resilience.
The five strategies for parents to free the anxious generation are:
- Knowing your job – a parent’s job is to establish safety by setting boundaries; a child’s job is to develop emotional regulation by experiencing and expressing their feelings.
- Strengthening your boundary muscle – boundaries are one of the most important ways to show your child you love them.
- Giving yourself permission to change course – give yourself permission to change screen time limits, take away a phone for a period of time, or remove apps or games you had previously approved.
- Competence is the antidote to anxiety – competence is only developed as children watch themselves navigate challenges, struggle, try things on their own, and eventually figure things out – give your children more freedom in the real world.
- Take collective action – Collaborate with other parents to turn individual family action into community action.
Haidt and Kennedy’s work underscores the importance of parental and educational guidance in navigating the social media landscape. Parents and schools play a crucial role in helping children understand the implications of their online behaviour and fostering a critical mindset toward the content they encounter. Conversations about online ethics, privacy and mental health can equip young users with the tools they need to engage with social media responsibly. By taking a proactive approach, we can help our children navigate social media safely while still allowing them to benefit from its positive aspects, when the time is right for them and for you.
If you would like to download a copy of Good Inside’s 5 Strategies for Parents to Free the Anxious Generation, please click here.
Sophie Fisher
Deputy Head of Junior School Donvale – Student Wellbeing
