Why is adolescence today more challenging than ever before?

‘The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.’
Socrates (469–399 B.C. )

From time immemorial, it seems that adults have taken on the self-appointed role of complaining about the teenagers of their age. Generation after generation, teenagers have responded with similar complaints about the attitudes, values, decisions and actions of the adults whose footsteps they will soon follow and whose messes they will have to clean up. Arguably, in many Carey households and in the broader community alike, the cycle of frustrated dialogue between our young people and adults continues.

In my role as Head of Senior School, I am privileged to be invited at times into the complex lives of the young people in our care. After leading in schools for more than two decades, I have seen – and at times shaken my head or smiled incredulously at – the myriad ways young people negotiate the challenges that come with preparing for life beyond school.

However, during the recent winter holiday, when I was blessed with a period of uninterrupted family time and personal and professional reflection, I came to determine that while the challenges of our 2024 Senior School students are not new, this is possibly one of the hardest periods in modern history to be a teenager. I say this for two main reasons:

1. No other generation has lived their lives completely in the age of social media

In 1998, avant-garde fashion designer Vivienne Westwood argued that, ‘The age in which we live, this non-stop distraction, is making it more impossible for the young generation to ever have curiosity or discipline... because you need to be alone to find out anything.’ I wonder what Vivienne would think of the ever-present challenge that is the overwhelming, all-consuming nature of social media for our young people. While as adults, we may be part of a dialogue regarding our experiences (both negative and positive) of social media and its impact on our sense of self and ability to focus, how can we possibly understand the experience of being a ‘digital native’? Our young people are, and have been for a long time, engaged – with or without our consent – in social media platforms, which require them to process, filter, and respond to targeted and often incorrect information, before their brains are ready for it.

2. It’s particularly difficult to know where and how to position yourself as a young person in the dialogue around gendered violence

There are many in our Carey community who celebrate, and understandably so, the ever-evolving and maturing discussions on how we as a nation might more effectively address the epidemic of violence against women and marginalised groups. However, one can only assume that our young people, whose day-to-day experiences are overwhelmed by information curated by a series of algorithms, which have no respect for our teenagers’ personal values or those espoused by their school or family, must feel confused about what society – in its real or online form – sees as the positive attributes of a great young man, woman, or gender-expansive person. We know that our Senior School students, regardless of gender, are vulnerable to the influence of the ‘manosphere’. Stephanie Wescott, a lecturer at the School of Education, Culture and Society at Monash University, describes this as ‘a loose group of online figures who espouse anti-feminist and misogynist ideas, and promote regressive ideas of masculinity’, such as the infamous Andrew Tate. In addition, ‘the deliberate spread of disinformation online and appeals to emotion over facts’, as described by Westcott, must certainly shape how our young people see themselves and where they fit in this important discussion.

Our response as adults, parents, and educators must be to provide the conditions for open and ongoing dialogue with our young people about these issues. We should support them in responding critically and with intention, helping them to frame their own beliefs and responses as they step their way into adulthood.

With this in mind, as a school, we are looking into opportunities to proactively address these issues and lead the way in providing the space needed for these dialogues to occur. Our work with the Corridor Cultures project forms part of this approach: we have seen the first round of results from this research and have begun implementing recommendations, including the development of Man Cave and Big Sister programs that promote personal, emotional and social development in a safe and inclusive space.

Further to our initiatives for students and on behalf of our Student Wellbeing Team, I am delighted to invite you to two parent forums focussed on Relationships and Sexuality Education from leading international experts, Katrina Marson (Monday 19 August, 7.00pm) and Dr Victoria Rawlings (Monday 2 September, 7.00pm). If these events are of interest to you, please see this link for detailed information about each of these sessions, including how to book your place.

With every best wish for a wonderful term ahead.

Kellie Lyneham
Head of Senior School